The Grey Hat Manifesto

by Da New Ment0r of PhoeniX.RisinG.GrouP

Hey you.  Yeah, you.  I'm that kid whose lunch you swiped.

Remember?

The one whose backpack you stole, and the one you made fun of a lot?  That was me.

I'm the one you laughed at when somebody tripped me.

You kicked me on the ground as you walked by.

I covered my head, and you thought it was pretty funny.

Remember that?

My mom had to buy me a new shirt, since that one was ripped.

I'm the one you poked fun at a lot in the hallways.  Every time you saw me, you called me a nerd, a geek, a bookworm and some other not-so-nice things.

You threw your food at me in the lunchroom and laughed.

I sat at that one table, alone.

Don't you remember me?

I'm the one who was really into computers.  The one who spent all his spare time reading a lot.  Yeah, that kid!

I got really good grades, but you got held back.

Do you remember?

To be fair, you didn't show up to class a whole lot.

Oh yeah, remember that time you snatched my homework and copied all the answers before class?  I knew you would do that!  That's the reason I wrote all the wrong stuff down the night before, then turned in the correct copy.  That was a good one!

Boy, that sure was a long time ago!

Well, I'm still into computers.  I actually bought a new one with your daughter's college fund.  You know, the one you were saving up for?  Thanks!  It's a super fast machine, but I actually prefer my 486.

It brings back a lot of good memories.

I checked your P.O. box for you the other day.  I didn't think you'd mind.  Oh, can I get your mother's maiden name?  I need it for something.  I'll get it from you.

I drive by your apartment sometimes when I'm bored.  I have a lot of free time, since I work from home.  It sure is nice to make your own hours!  Oh yeah, you should probably make it a habit to lock your patio door more often.

I understand you lost your job the other day.  You have to admit you had the worst schedule, though.  I tried to talk the boss out of it, as he's a very good friend of mine.  I'm just sorry I couldn't change his mind.

Oh, I'm not sure if you've checked your credit lately, but you may want to.  You probably shouldn't have thrown that stuff out with your Social Security number still printed on it.  Well, "live and learn," so they say!

A Realtor friend of mine told me she had to deny you a mortgage loan!  Something about the wrong forms of identification, bad credit or something?  I'll try and talk to her about it, okay?

I also heard your ex-wife found love elsewhere.  I'm amazed she learned about you meeting somebody else while you two were still together!  She told me the whole story.  Man, people just can't keep anything a secret anymore, can they?

Everything is going great here!  I just wanted to catch up with you.  I'm not sure if you remember me, though.  I definitely never forgot about you.

Take care/comb your hair,

That kid.

*-=:%[KNoWLeDGE iS tHE aNSWeR: BaN FiReaRMS]%:=-*

Greetinx to Toxic Zombies for the intro line and my boy 'Keeng Tusk z'Almighty"